Along your ethical non-monogamy journey, you’ve come across the term ‘ambiamorous’, but what does it mean, and does it apply to you?
It really sits somewhere between polyamory and monogamy. It’s neither one or the other, but both at the same time. Ambiamory or ambiamorous is a relationship style that involves being open to both monogamy and polyamory.
For many people (and perhaps even yourself) the idea of being either strictly monogamous or polyamorous can feel limiting. And when it comes to love and relationships, why should we have to choose?
Ambiamory offers a refreshing middle ground for those who feel they don’t quite fit into either category.
Let’s take a little look at how ambiamory might manifest in a relationship…
What is Ambiamory?
The term ambiamory is all about being cool with both monogamous and polyamorous relationships andfalls under the polyamory umbrella, along with subsections like non-hierarchical polyamory and kitchen table polyamory.
Unlike folks who stick to one relationship structure, ambiamorous people can switch between the two, depending on what suits them best at the time.
They enjoy the deep connection monogamy offers and also appreciate the freedom and variety of polyamory.
Since they can handle both types of relationships, ambiamorous people are usually great at communicating and setting clear boundaries with their partners.
Do Ambiamorous People Have a Preference?
Sure thing! Ambiamorous folks can have preferences, but they aren’t always fixed. It really depends on what’s going on in their lives and how they’re growing personally.
Sometimes, settling down with one partner might feel right, giving them a sense of security and deep emotional connection. Other times, exploring and having diverse connections through polyamory might be more appealing.
| For ambiamorous people, it’s all about adapting to what makes them happiest at any moment while keeping communication open and honest with their partners. |
How Do Ambiamorous Relationships Work?
Ambiamorous relationships are all about being adaptable and keeping the lines of communication open with everyone involved.
At their heart, these relationships focus on what each person needs and wants, offering the flexibility to move between monogamous and polyamorous setups.
It’s all about mutual respect and understanding, making sure everyone feels comfortable and appreciated. People in ambiamorous relationships tend to have honest chats about their desires, boundaries, and any shifts in how things are going.
This approach helps build a supportive space where personal growth and deep connections can flourish, no matter how many partners are in the mix.
You can find out more about polyamorous relationship ‘rules’ that can help inform your ambiamorous lifestyle.
What is the Difference Between Polyamorous & Ambiamorous?
Polyamorous folks are all about balancing multiple romantic relationships at the same time, whereas ambiamorous people are a bit more flexible.
They can switch between being in a monogamous or polyamorous setup, depending on what suits them at the moment.
Polyamory is about loving and connecting with more than one person, with everyone being in the loop and cool with it. On the flip side, ambiamory is more about going with the flow.
Ambiamorous people don’t stick strictly to one way of doing relationships. This flexibility lets them enjoy the perks of both monogamy and polyamory, adjusting their relationship style to fit what brings them happiness and helps them grow.
To make it easier, we’ve put the main differences into a table to help you understand where you might fit with these relationship preferences.
| Polyamory | Ambiamory | |
| Definition | A relationship style where individuals have multiple romantic and sexual partners with consent and open communication. | A relationship style in which individuals have multiple romantic and sexual partners but prefer one primary partner. |
| Primary Partner | No designated primary partner. | A primary partner is typically present, providing a foundation for the relationship. |
| Relationship Dynamics | Relationships are generally considered equal, with no hierarchy. | Relationships often involve a hierarchical structure, with the primary partner holding a more significant position. |
| Commitment | Commitment can be expressed in various ways, including emotional, physical, or time-based. | Commitment is often stronger to the primary partner, with varying levels of commitment to other partners. |
| Jealousy | Jealousy is addressed openly and honestly within the relationship. | Jealousy may be more pronounced, especially regarding the primary partner. |
These are just general traits, and everyone’s experience in polyamorous and ambiamorous relationships can differ. It’s super important to chat openly and honestly with your partners to set boundaries and expectations that suit everyone involved.
How Do You Tell if You’re Ambiamorous?
Figuring out if you’re an ambiamorous person often starts with some introspection about your relationship preferences.
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How to Get into an Ambiamorous Relationship
There’s no one fixed way to dip your toe into the world of ambiamorous relationships, but we’ve put together some basic steps that can help you understand how to try this lifestyle.
- Self-Reflection – Begin by understanding your own relationship desires and boundaries. Consider how comfortable you feel with both monogamous and polyamorous setups and what you hope to gain from an ambiamorous relationship.
- Open Communication – When entering a relationship or discussing your ambiamorous nature with a current partner, ensure you’re having open and honest conversations. Sharing your feelings, boundaries, and expectations upfront helps establish a strong foundation for any relationship style.
- Finding Like-Minded Individuals – Look for communities or platforms where open-minded people gather. Illicit Encounters is one such platform that can help you connect with others who understand and share your perspective on relationships. Engaging with communities that celebrate diverse relationship styles can offer support and insights.
- Prioritise Respect & Consistency – Ensure every aspect of your relationship is built on mutual respect. Maintaining consistency in how you interact with your partners, regardless of the relationship type, is key to fostering trust and security.
- Flexibility & Adaptation – Be prepared for change as relationships evolve. Flexibility and the willingness to adapt are crucial in navigating the fluid dynamics of ambiamorous relationships. Regularly check in with yourself and your partners to assess needs and happiness levels
Illicit Encounters can provide a safe and secure stepping stone into ambiamorous relationships by connecting you with other open-minded people who are looking to explore new relationship dynamics.
Some Resources to Help Your Research
Here are a few UK-based resources that can support your journey into ambiamorous and ethical non-monogamous relationships:
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Checking out these resources can give you some great insights and help you connect with others, making it easier to navigate the different relationship styles out there today.
Final Thoughts: Make Ambiamorous Relationship Styles Work for You
Ambiamorous relationships can be just right if you appreciate adaptability and openness in your connections.
They let you smoothly move between monogamous and polyamorous experiences depending on what you need and want over time. This flexibility helps you grow while keeping meaningful bonds.
By focusing on communication, respect, and understanding, ambiamory can offer a fulfilling and supportive framework for anyone looking for diverse and balanced connections.
Find people who are open to non-monogamous relationships by signing up for Illicit Encounters!
FAQs
Can Someone Be Poly & Monogamous?
Yes, someone can identify as both polyamorous and monogamous at different times.
Being ambiamorous allows individuals to transition between these relationship styles, depending on their current needs and personal circumstances, while prioritising communication and understanding with their partners.
Is Ambiamorous Valid?
Yes, ambiamorous is a valid orientation. It acknowledges that people can find fulfilment in both monogamous and polyamorous relationships at different times, emphasising adaptability, open communication, and the unique dynamics of each relationship while respecting individual needs.
Can You Be Poly if Your Partner Isn’t?
Yes, you can be poly if your partner isn’t; however, it involves open communication, understanding, and consent from all parties.
Both partners need to be comfortable with the dynamics, ensuring mutual respect and honesty in navigating such a relationship.
Is Ambiamory Part of ENM?
Yes, ambiamory is part of ethical non-monogamy (ENM). It allows individuals to switch between monogamous and polyamorous relationships, emphasising respect and consent.
Ambiamory focuses on adaptability and maintaining meaningful connections based on one’s evolving needs and personal circumstances.
What is an Ambi Relationship?
An ambi relationship is fluid, shifting dynamics based on whether the ambiamorous individual is in a monogamous or polyamorous relationship. It adapts to suit current needs, priorities, and the consensual agreements made with partners.
What is the Ambiamorous Flag?
The ambiamorous flag features an ‘a’ symbol in the centre, with a background of stripes transitioning from blue at the top to red at the bottom, with black in the middle.
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