Article Updated: 15/10/2024
Adultery is a term that is rarely used outside of period dramas on Netflix nowadays, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist! But what is adultery really, and what does it mean for your relationship if you partake?
Adultery is more than just a fancy word for cheating. It’s a specific type of infidelity that once had severe consequences for those who committed it.
While you won’t find yourself in front of a judge for it anymore, it can still have a significant impact on your primary relationship. So, what is it?
Definition of Adultery in Marriage
If we’re going by legal definitions in the UK, adultery is purely about sex.
It’s the voluntary sexual intercourse between a married individual and someone who is not their spouse. In simpler terms, it’s when a married person has a sexual relationship with someone other than their partner.
Of course, the legal definition of adultery is a pretty narrow view, and there are some differences of opinion.
Adultery can have different meanings for different couples and cultures. For some, it may include emotional infidelity or even flirting with another person.
Ultimately, what constitutes adultery depends on the values and boundaries set within a marriage.
Adultery Across Different Religions & Beliefs
In general, what counts as adultery is pretty much the same in Western religions and the law. It’s seen as a big no-no, one of the major sins.
That said, there are some exceptions, usually benefiting the guys. For instance, in religions like Mormonism, men can have multiple wives, but it’s still considered wrong to engage in sexual activity outside that setup.
Adultery also gets a thumbs down in Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism, and other major religions, though there are occasional exceptions, like the need to produce an heir.
| Adultery vs Cheating There’s a difference between adultery and cheating, even though there’s overlap. Cheating is a broader term that relates to crossing the boundaries set in a relationship in regard to sexual contact with other people. Adultery specifically pertains to sexual contact with people outside of your legal marriage partnership. Find out what’s classed as cheating! |
What is Considered as Committing Adultery?
We’ve covered the definition ofWhile the legal definition of adultery is clear-cut, personal interpretations vary widely. What one couple considers infidelity might not be seen the same way by another.
These views can encompass emotional connections, flirting, or other non-physical interactions, highlighting the importance of understanding and respecting each partner’s boundaries and definitions within a relationship.
| Some of the most common personal definitions of adultery include… 1. Having sex with someone else outside of your marriage 2. A physical encounter with a third party that may not have included sex 3. Emotional cheating 4. Cyber cheating or sexting 5. Watching pornography |
Once you get away from the essential definition, the waters start getting murkier. For example, some people might view their partner watching pornography as an adulterous act, while others might be fine with everything up to a drunken kiss!
Ultimately, adultery is a betrayal of the boundaries and rules set in your relationship, so it’s important to have these conversations, especially before getting married!
Is Adultery a Crime in the UK?
No, adultery is not considered a criminal offence in the UK. In fact, it hasn’t been a crime since the introduction of the Matrimonial Causes Act of 1857.
This means that you cannot be punished by law for committing adultery. However, it doesn’t mean that your spouse won’t react negatively if they find out and potentially file for divorce.
| Spouses no longer have to prove adultery during divorce proceedings, but we’ll cover that more below! |
What Happens When Someone Commits Adultery?
When someone cheats, how people react and the outcomes can really vary, depending on the person and their relationship.
Some might decide to leave adulterers, seeing cheating as a deal-breaker that damages trust beyond repair and choose to end things.
Others might decide to tackle the issue head-on, treating it as a wake-up call to fix deeper problems in the marriage.
These couples might try therapy to rebuild trust and improve communication, looking at infidelity as the start of a tough journey toward growth and recommitment.
Then there are those who might open up the relationship after cheating, setting new boundaries to include non-monogamous arrangements. They may feel this brings more honesty and allows for exploration, addressing unmet needs that led to cheating.
Why Do People Commit Adultery?
There are tons of different answers to this question, but a common one is there’s a need not being met.
Adultery might happen because someone feels they’re not getting what they need, emotionally or sexually, especially in a dead bedroom situation. They might feel isolated and neglected, searching for someone who gets them.
Sometimes, it’s about craving adventure and excitement. For some, adultery is a thrill, a way to prove they can still surprise themselves.
And then there’s the realisation that maybe they’re just not ready to settle down yet.
How Does Adultery Affect Divorce?
Even though adultery isn’t a crime, it can still be one of many catalysts that drive couples to actually divorce.
Adultery may prompt a spouse to file for divorce, impacting proceedings by influencing custody arrangements or financial settlements.
Though no longer legally required to be proved in divorce proceedings in the UK, adultery can still carry emotional weight, potentially causing irreparable trust damage, leading to divorce.
Is Adultery Grounds for Divorce?
Legally, no. Adultery isn’t grounds for divorce in the UK, but that’s only because of the Divorce Dissolution and Separation Act of 2022.
This Act introduced no-fault divorces, which means you no longer need to provide a reason for your divorce beyond the fact that you want one!
It takes a lot of stress out of divorce proceedings, with spouses no longer needing to provide proof of adultery or other unreasonable behaviour.
Does Adultery Affect a Divorce Settlement?
No, adultery does not directly affect divorce settlements in the UK and isn’t commonly taken into consideration by divorce courts.
Financial settlements are determined based on factors like each spouse’s financial needs, contributions, and the welfare of any children rather than misconduct like adultery.
The process focuses on achieving fair outcomes rather than penalising either party for infidelity. Although emotional factors may indirectly influence discussions, legal proceedings prioritise equitable resolutions over moral judgments.
| Some divorce solicitors and other legal counsel can be very adept at using adultery to sway settlements, especially when child custody is involved. So, while it isn’t legally relevant to your settlement, adultery can still affect the outcome indirectly. |
Final Thoughts: What is Adultery & How Can It Affect Relationships?
While adultery legally means having sex outside of marriage, people can see it very differently. Some couples think it includes emotional connections or non-physical interactions, while others see it as breaking the rules of their open relationship.
It’s super important to be on the same page about what adultery means, as it can really affect your relationship. Having open, honest conversations about boundaries and expectations is key to navigating these tricky waters.
If you’re looking for something discreet to spice up your relationship or explore extramarital affairs, Illicit Encounters can connect you with like-minded individuals who get you.
| Unsure about the future of your marriage? Take our divorce quiz to get clarity! *Disclaimer: This quiz is for informational purposes only and should not be used as a substitute for professional advice. We thought this was important to note, for just in case.* |
Article updated: 11/10/2024
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